Che|Siren|I Was a People Pleaser

People Pleaser: someone or something that pleases or wants to please people.

Often a person who has an emotional need to please others often at the expense of his or her own needs or desires.

A people pleaser, that used to be me. I was the one in the room-but not really because she never said anything. I was putting myself in situation after situation that I was not comfortable in, as to not ruffle too many feathers.

 I always joke that I was a bit of a hoe in high school. I figured if I put it in those words it doesn’t sound as bad. In reality, I was easy because I wanted everyone to like me. There were a few long term relationships but in the end I lost myself. I lost my confidence, my self worth, my faith, everything that made me, me.

My last relationship, before I met my husband, was an abusive one. Not physically but definitely emotionally. I quit hanging out with friends, I quit my job, disrespected my parents, had sex whenever he wanted it-all because he loved me. One day we got into an argument, the worst argument we had ever had and before I knew it, I was backed into a corner with my hands up and him yelling over me. In that moment something clicked inside me. This was not me. I could not be the people pleaser anymore. It was time I stopped pleasing others and started pleasing me! As women, we grow up conditioned to be pleasers. If you weigh too much-go on a diet. Too skinny? Go eat a cheeseburger. Go to school to get an education but don’t let your smarts show. Boobs too small or nose too big, get plastic surgery. The list goes on and on.

We need to be our own pleasers!! Screw what the world tells us to do. Embrace every part of you!

We owe it to ourselves to be the badass women we are with no apologies. With no expectations but our own.

So I encourage you to look within yourself. Are you pleasing others, or are you pleasing you?


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